Resistance • DESIRÉE PAIS


Resistance is one of those experiences that pop up when you least expect it, want it, or need it. It can be extremely frustrating and disheartening to deal with, especially if you felt like you were making progress in a particular direction. As someone who is extremely familiar with resistance, I have learned a thing or two about how to work with this strong feeling when it shows up. 

TEAMWORK | It took me a while to learn that you can't fight resistant, you have to work with it. Become friends with it. Negotiate with it. If you fight it, it becomes an uphill battle. But if you can negotiate with it, make terms with it, you'll get somewhere and fast. For example, when my teacher Harijiwan suggested I do a 31 minute meditation practice, I thought it would be doable since I had already had an 11 minute practice of this particular meditation. When I switched it to 31, it was a mess. I couldn't wake up in the morning to practice, I would skip days, leading me to feel less than empowered by my practice. It took me a couple of weeks of feeling sorry for myself to finally say, "Look, it's better to do 11 minutes everyday and develop a strong consistent practice of building self-trust rather than forcing yourself to do 31 and keep falling off track." Since then, I've been the most consistent with my personal practice ever and reaping the benefits of doing it daily, even if it's not as gung-ho as I usually try to be, which obviously was a great learning experience to not be so extremist. Slow and steady wins the race. 

BABY STEPS | One time I was feeling really resistant towards my healing process and I asked my acupuncturist what to do. He looks at me straight in the eyes and says, "Everyday, just put one foot in front of the other." Whenever I find myself in resistance, I tell myself just that: Get moving, even if it's just one step towards where I want to go. Just put one foot in front of the other, literally, get out of my mind and start moving my physical body. The mind is often what blocks us from taking action so if we can focus on the body to take action, it can really get us out of our head. Sometimes I have to say it out loud and just force myself to move my hands to my computer to write that article or move my feet to get out the door for a run. And suddenly, I'm moving in the direction I'm trying to go. 

TREATS | Treat yourself! I am so not a fan of waking up early in the morning to do a bunch of meditations when I could be sleeping instead. So, I have an agreement with myself that every morning I get up I get to have a delicious cup of bulletproof coffee. I LOVE coffee so this makes me really excited to get up in the morning early. Even if I'm not eager to do the particular thing I am resisting, knowing there is a reward on the other side is enough fuel to get me moving. Eventually, when the results start to show from you showing up even in the face of resistance and conquering it, feeling amazing will become fuel to do what you need to do because wanting to continue to feel good in your body, mind, and spirit is the best motivation to keep up. 

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Manifestation with Lacy Phillips