#NATIVEWEEK No. 73
a roundup of all the things that are supporting our growth
Lately, growth has been about leaning into the discomfort with a bit of chic comfort around. For me, it started when the only two intentions that I set this year were: "Universe, please send me the teachers, books, mirrors (in my life) to help me learn to fully let go of being controlling and to let go of perfectionism. Boy, have the teachers, experiences, and mirrors started showing up. My Vedic meditation teacher has me deeply working on trying to get into my heart and surrendering to the moment.
It's a deeper kind of giving over than anything this control freak has ever attempted before, and boy does EVERYTHING come up and get felt fully in my heart. That's been a practice in itself. And the others have me doing some heavy workaround speaking all of my truth at any cost. So while I re-dial my neural pathways through this work, learning to trust in a way I never have before:
These are the components that are making me feel cozy, graceful, and chic in the meantime.
These overalls all day every day! They can be dressed any which way - up or down - flats or light heels. And they hide the few extra pounds I put on from fried clams in Salem to all the pasta in Milan to the baguettes of France. Whew, eating my feelings stops on the flight back to LA Sunday.
Back to the autoimmune protocol when I'm back as some symptoms have flared.
After 3 days of my phone primarily on airplane mode while in Uzés, France, I realized how incredibly addicted to it I am. And how so much of my neurosis went away when I wasn't constantly bombarded with consuming, and other people's lives. So now, I'm figuring out a schedule and reconfiguring the current relationship that I have with my phone through this read. Grateful to catch it on @marleegrace's feed (which is ever so inspiring).
This to hide under all spring and summer with said overalls (and a solid pair of flats) when I have to be seen but I don't want due to uncomfortable growing, phases of free-fall, and inwardness.
It's been three months since I decided to stop playing small (thank you, OPULENCE) and to start showing up for my authentic self. It's been both absolutely incredible and really damn hard because there's contraction happening when you stop saying yes to things that you've usually said yes to and start saying NO.
This is the reality of growth; the good and the bad, the calm before the storm, and as Lacy has perfectly coined the phrase "The Magic Dark." That moment right before that special thing comes into your life when you can't see how it's all going to play out but you trust that you deserve something better. So, we wait. And that's where I'm at right now.
How do I cope? Oh, lemme tell you...
GIRL GANG • I've had to say no to things that are no longer serving me. I've had countless (SERIOUSLY) tests coming in of people that are not aligned with my authentic nature and I've had to say no. Not because I don't love them, but because right now, it's just not a working. As a result, I'm making coffee dates, signing up for workshops with people that I do feel aligned with right now. Some of my favorites: Oh Holisticism Community, classes at WMN Space, RAMA, YogaWorks, and Wanderlust. There isn't a day when I don't join a class or workshop these days. I just need the community and support.
THREE LETTERS: LBD • When life gets busy (hello, photo shoots during the day and then dates at night) the last thing I have time for is a mid-day wardrobe change. Therefore, I need looks that take me from day to night. I've been pairing this beautiful John Patrick Organic Slip Dress with a black turtleneck underneath and simple flats during the day and then tossing the turtleneck aside, popping on some heels and create a little more of a sultry look with a pop of color on the lips right before a night out on the town. Ha, who am I kidding? I'm in LA - I'm in bed by 1030pm.
BYE, COFFEE • Those late nights quickly turn into early mornings, and since I've given up Bulletproof coffee -- the stimulants were making my adrenals go wack, I now am trying out the Four Sigmatic Lions Mane Elixir. I feel lighter and the energy levels are much more manageable.
ALL THE KNOWLEDGE • Let's face it, we don't know everything -- nor do we need to. Thanks to podcasts (and LA commutes) I'm able to listen to hours of podcast interviews with the best people in the industry. Current obsession: Anything with/by John Wineland and Tim Ferriss (I love how he nerds out on such specific things, really inspire me to give my heart and soul to everything I create).
IMMUNITY • It's flu season and (knock on wood), I haven't caught anything. I've been keeping the stress levels low and as a result, I've protected my immune system. But, let's be real - those late nights and early mornings can cause havoc on the body. So, as a safety precaution, I've been pumping up the nutrients by swapping any potential unhealthy foods with fresh, bright colored foods and juices. I'm constantly on the go, so when I can I'm always picking up the best stuff on the market. Moon Juice, Erewhon, Green Tea (can never go wrong with this anti-oxidant packed warm beverage) and this classic Wellness Formula vitamin.
Basically, it's all about just supporting myself, the change, the transition and my body. Because at the end of the day, it's all about just us taking care of ourselves and those special things that we desire in life, we #1 already have inside of us and #2 will come at the perfect time so just enjoy the moment.
I spoke a bit about the personal growth I'm experiencing in Introducing March • GROWTH. I've been feeling plenty of contractions, uncertainties and insecurities since taking my first leap of faith in The Universe. Growth is tough and confusing, and we're left with very little guidance on how to navigate these times of transition: "The Magic Dark." The Capricorn that I am internalizes and coils inwards whenever I'm faced with change. My intention for this period of growth is to make my inward reflections a positive, deep-learning experience rather than me hiding from the new realities shifting around me.
Some tools that have helped me through this time of growth
BATHS • I may be way behind here, but I've just recently incorporated baths into my nightly routine and they have done wonders for my mental and physical well-being. I include some of my favorite essential oils: eucalyptus, lavender or orange and epsom salts; listen to some music or just zone out and let my thoughts and anxieties from the day wash away.
BOOKS & PODCASTS • I'm really investing in spending more time reading. Characters and stories have been huge expanders for me and it helps immensely in trusting what's to come in my own story. My current reads are: The Woman Destroyed & The Anthropology of an American Girl. I've also just finished You Are a Badass. I've been listening to the Podcast "Millennial," which I highly recommend.
WALKS • Nothing is more healing, grounding or soothing to me than a nature stroll: my meditation.
GIFTING MYSELF • Nothing like treating yourself to something you really desire. I've had my eye on these leggings and planning to take the plunge. My most recent self-gift was this candle (little or big, all gifts count).
DRESSING UP • I've always been a minimalist - jeans + t-shirt + no makeup - but recently I've put more energy into my style, not to support my ego, but to boost my confidence and get me out of my convenient little apartment office. I choose an outfit I feel strong (and comfortable) in and a spray of my favorite Elizabeth and James Nirvana.