Cutting Energy


Create space for your partner to come through.

Where you are still energetically attached to people taking up space in your partnership space, it is blocking your partner from coming through. This goes for all energy - the same way that energy begins to attach the moment you start developing feelings for another person (AND ESPECIALLY when you sleep with them), if there's anyone that you are still energetically holding space for or are attached to, you're completely blocking your person from coming through.

I'm going to list out examples so that this is clear. If you don't find your exact example here, you should be able to piece it together based on the examples that I share. These are from my vast body of clients, and they all reflect energetic/physical blocks that are communicating to The Universe that you are not in your worth, more importantly, that your self-worth is not in alignment with the worth of the amazing person you're calling in.



  • Still hooking up with or sleeping with people even though they aren't your person.

  • Really good friends (but secretly in love with) this person of the opposite sex (or same sex) and waiting for them to realize that they have feelings for you too.

  • You're a sexually empowered woman or man, so you sleep with anyone you please. *Look, I'm all for someone who is authentically and entirely in their power, but I will wholeheartedly say that I've never met a woman in my practice that is genuinely sexually empowered. I've met very few in my life but never in my practice. However, every woman I encounter in my practice that thinks she's a sexually empowered feminist, once truly doing the work, it always comes down to the energetic that she is sleeping around too soon and frequently because she is in need of attention, validation, or she's using it as a way to cope with trauma. This also goes for men (though it's more socially acceptable).

  • Exes. But what if we're just friends? Here's the deal. This is possible, but it's energetically impossible until both parties have entirely fallen in love with another since being with each other (therefore pulling the energetic cord from each other and plugging it into another). At this point, you both are no longer energetically taking up space in the area of love; therefore the two can be friends if it's healthy, evolved, respectful, completely platonic, and an equal exchange of friendship.

  • "twin flames"! Look, spiritually speaking, the difference between a twin flame and a soulmate is they come to teach you lessons and help you grow. The latter continue growing together. I believe that we have many soulmates and past life intersections in one lifetime. So chalk up all that you learned from your "twin flame" and let that expander and lesson go!

  • People in your life that are taking advantage of you. What does that mean? Led you on, keeping you as a side-person, hook up buddy, didn't respect your vulnerability and heart, financially took advantage of you...

  • The person that won't commit - doesn't believe in commitment, wants to see other people too, is stalling commitment, or "just got out of something serious."

  • Someone came through and they are everything on paper but you're not physically attracted to them or you don't feel the sexual attraction. They're not your manifestation.

  • You're still in a relationship or marriage. You will only attract tests and lessons. You'll need to first move out, process and heal, then open that space up. If you feel like you processed and healed during the relationship, then that's different. However, only you can be honest with yourself here, as we aren't in session for me to call you out and look at the energetics. That goes for all of the above.

  • Note that other types of people can block this space as well. Enmeshed and controlling parents, controlling narcissistic friends that require a lot of your time and support, codependent roommates. Survey around to see if anyone takes up your partnership energy.

Still not seeing yours on this list? It's this simple - if they aren't committing to you and giving you what you want, they are taking up space. If they don't match the qualities of what you want, they are taking up space. Wondering if they'll grow into it? WELL, they are taking up space NOW. So close the portal on them. They aren't the one right now. 


How Do I close The Portal?

It's energy, so actions mean everything.

Closing the portal means that they're not in your energy field anymore or that they're not getting any more of your energy. I don't care how you go about this, as long as what you do isn't an effort/manipulation (or hope) that it will make them step up and become the person you want. From conscious communication to deleting their number, you have to decide what this means for you. Whatever it is, it says their energy needs to completely free up your space in order for your person to come through. For some, this means keeping them at a distance, and for most, this means closing the portal on them entirely. 

"But spirituality says that I should evolve and work through any relationship?" I'm not a spiritual teacher, I'm a manifestation advisor that is here to have you actually manifest your intention. 



Take note of who is taking up space.

Create a timeline of everyone you've hooked up with, dated, slept with, or crushed in the last three years. Note who is still around and taking up space. Close the energy on all of them. Make sure to include any caretakers or friendships that might also be taking up this space and create healthy boundaries. 

This is a safe community, created to encourage communication between each other and to share experiences. Please leave questions and comments below for your fellow friends to respond based on their personal experience. Constructive and nurturing feedback only. For more connection, head over to the growing Secret Society Manifestation Facebook Group! Lacy will not be answering comments or questions or navigating your personal circumstances. Those can be done in a session.

Looking for even more manifestation support? Submit your questions through Supported – a subscription-based manifestation class with lacy twice a month that supports the grey area available inside The Pathway Membership. Your most pressing questions dictate the content each month.

Lacy Phillips34 Comments