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All developmental stages of our childhood are extremely important because they shape many of our beliefs and behaviors as adults – including manifestation. I find infancy to be the most notable, for it is the phase where we learn if we can trust entirely and  depend on someone, and we learn if we are worthy of depending on someone.  Therefore, this phase creates the blueprint for all other relationships in our life, which is very important for manifestation.

In order to fully learn to trust in this phase, our needs have to be entirely met. In this stage, we are completely codependent on our mother (mother figure/caretaker). In order for us to feel safe, she has to be completely secure and stable within herself and in her body, in addition to taking care of our needs (feeding, changing, swaddling, soothing). If one area is weaker – say she is physically taking care of our needs, but emotionally she is lacking – this would plant a seed of shame or unworthiness, ultimately creating an inability to fully trust and feel safe. If a safe environment and care-taking isn’t well established, the need for outside soothing is imprinted during this phase of our life. Therefore, we’re more likely to develop pathological relationships with other forms of soothing later in life: food, chemicals, sex, shopping, _________ (filling the soothing void).

We also learn energetic trust and safety at this time. In order to be fully developed in this area, our mother needs to have a deep sense of self-love and security, both internally and externally. It is also equally important that we are welcomed and wanted in the world.

She needs to accept us entirely. For example, if she accidentally gets pregnant and feels the pressure to marry someone she doesn’t love, on a deep kinesthetic level, we absorb her feelings about herself and our worth in an absolute energetic belief of worth, feeling unworthy, a burden, a mistake.


Have you had an ingestive addiction (overeating, undereating, overdrinking, or drugs?)

Do you have trouble trusting your ability to get your needs met?

Do you find it hard to trust other people? Do you feel you must be in control at all times (lacking trust)?

Do you ignore body signals of physical needs? (Do you eat when you’re not hungry?)

Do you neglect your physical needs? (Do you ignore good nutrition or fail to get enough exercise? Do you go to the dentist and Dr. only for emergencies)?

Do you have deep fears of abandonment? Do you feel, or have ever felt desperate because a love relationship ended?

Have you considered suicide because a love relationship ended?

Do you often feel that you don’t truly fit in or belong anywhere? Do you feel that people don’t really welcome you or want your presence?

In social situations, do you try to be invisible so that no one will notice you?

Do you try to be so helpful (even indispensable) in your relationships that the other person (friend, lover, spouse, child, parent) cannot leave you?

Do you have great needs to be touched? Or does touch soothe you most? (massage, cuddling, rubbing, light scratching)

Do you have a continual and obsessive need to be valued and esteemed?



Journal everything notable that came up during your DI

What came up for you surrounding:



Soothing over ingestive addictions?



Having your needs met?

Too helpful vs receiving?

Physical touch?

This is a safe community, created to encourage communication between each other and to share experiences. Please leave questions and comments below for your fellow friends to respond based on their personal experience. Constructive and nurturing feedback only. For more connection, head over to the growing Secret Society Manifestation Facebook Group! Lacy will not be answering comments or questions or navigating your personal circumstances. Those can be done in a session.

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Lacy Phillips85 Comments