An Amazing Romantic Connection
Name: Taylor Ridge
Are you currently a Pathway Member?: Yes
What was on your manifestation list?: So many things! This testimonial is specifically about partnership, but in this last year of work (all through COVID), I've manifested a partner, my own apartment 10 minutes from the beach, a salary raise, a specific job, and so much more.
What workshops did you use and what blocks did you discover during the DIs & workshops?: I was doing the Manifestation Challenge during this specific time but spent most of my time in Unblocked Inner Child & Unblocked Shadow.
What expanders did you find?: Initially, I used expanders that I didn't actually know (Lacy, Jessie James Decker/Eric Decker, Kristin Cavallari, etc.) but began turning to the TBM Pathway Community and searching for expanders there! It was so helpful because I realized that I lacked that 3rd piece: expanders.
What tests did you face? Which did you pass? Not pass?: Faced so many tests in dating. From people that would disappear then show back up or find that shiny carrot that was 97% of what I wanted. I was being tested with him repeatedly until finally, I began to emotionally prepare myself to cut it off - I wrote in a journal entry on 12/22/2020, "I am done. I no longer want to give my love to someone who doesn't deserve it." "My true manifestation is just around the corner."...and six days later, he was!
Did you experience a magic dark period? If so, tell us about it.: Yes - I was manifesting so many things in my life regarding housing and career, but felt like I was floundering in the "love" department. It was important for me to meet my partner organically (in-person) but didn't shy away from trying to use dating apps. However, I kept dating these total duds and started to be firm about saying no. Finally, I decided I was just going to "take a break" from dating for a while until the day before Halloween, where I stated that I was ready to begin calling in a viable life partner. The next day, I met my shiny carrot - and the story continues from there!
How did your manifestation come through?: Wanted to share something AMAZING that came out of the Manifestation Challenge this past month! :) This is going to be a long one, so hang tight if you read it. Lol!
It's kind of a 2 part story, so I'll try to get to all the major details. The biggest thing I want to mention is just how much Lacy's work really did for me in a year (in so many aspects, but I'm going to talk about partnership in this post!). I'm a few days past my 1-year mark with TBM, and I can genuinely say that Lacy Phillips CHANGED MY LIFE. Words can't even describe how thankful I am for this work! Now onto the story...
I entered the dating scene again around September (I had taken a few months of a break due to a break-up and reprioritizing my life, moving, etc.) and was starting to uncover a lot of my shadows in dating, including my inability to say no. I was also the queen of ghosting (so bad) and was AWFUL at ending things. I always let things go on for much longer than they should. With Lacy's work and while casually re-entering the dating scene, it became a priority for me to say NO when I noticed red flags or just wasn't feeling it.
After about two months of that, I decided that I was going to start calling in a legitimate partner. I'm really big on authentically meeting people and have a really hard time on dating apps (all the previous guys I had gone on dates with were via Bumble), so fast forward to Halloween night. I ended up meeting this INCREDIBLE guy at a Halloween event. He was wonderful; we danced all night, such a gentleman, so respectful, amazing conversation - everything seemed kismet. We ended up going on a date the next day and a few days after that. He possessed every quality I could've wanted in a man and then some, checking off every single box on my list, except...
1. He was previously divorced and had 3 kids who live 3 hours up north in central California. While that in itself isn't the problem, he did spend half of his week up there and the other half down south where we met.
2. He didn't want to get re-married again after what he went through, but marriage is something I've always wanted. This wasn't discussed until about a month into dating.
He was my shiny carrot. Everything continued to progress beautifully, and we had this amazing chemistry and connection. I haven't had something like this with somebody in a LONG time - and quite frankly, it's never been as amazing as this. 6 weeks later, he springs something on me and has a little freak out moment because he felt that he wasn't able to give me everything I needed and deserved, and was trying to navigate it all. At this point, I was turned off, and it was at the same time the Manifestation Challenge was starting. I decided to do it because I knew I wanted to be in my worth, whatever the outcome may be.
As the challenge progressed, I began to put my boundaries down with my shiny carrot and let him know my expectations, or I was willing to walk away. Well, sure enough - he worked on them, and we got back on a good path for a bit, but something in my gut was telling me this wasn't right. I began to mentally prepare myself to end it soon. But on the last week of the challenge, I decided to go snowboarding up in the mountains with my best friend, and we ended up getting stuck in a snowbank due to being in a car collision during a snowstorm (everyone was ok). We couldn't get help from anyone (CHP, AAA, anything!), so we ended up calling the fire department who came out to help us (they were miraculously able to get to us, whereas no one else was).
They ended up not being able to do anything for us because of the storm and offered to take us back to the station so we could look for lodging overnight until the storm cleared. There wasn't any lodging available, so they ended up offering the house of one of their firefighters who lived locally who had room and had called out that day (they 100% vouched for him in terms of safety). We accepted the offer and ended up staying at his house, and after hours and hours of conversation by the fire, it was obvious that we both felt an amazing, romantic connection. Though there's way more to the story, everything about this was special - he asked me out on a date that night, and we continued to explore the idea of progressing further.
During this time, I still had my shiny carrot on the other end. I had yet to officially accept that he was, in fact, my shiny carrot. I still had hope, and instead of rushing to end things like I was initially going to do, I decided to take my time in weighing my options and not make any rash decisions in the name of being blinded by "love" or "something new." Old me was very quick to make impulsive decisions, oftentimes ignoring things just for the sake of it being new.
This is why I decided to respectfully see both of them simultaneously to feel it all out, do my DIs, reflect + journal, and see what I needed to feel like my truest self. I started looking at how they both were treating me, how I felt around them, what was a test vs. not a test, etc. My shiny carrot started disappearing. My fireman consistently showed up.
Shiny carrot wasn't present, went days without talking to me or finishing conversations, made excuses, etc. Firemen was there every day, FaceTiming me at night or sending me a message during the day asking how I was doing. Shiny carrot didn't take the initiative to make further plans; we hadn't seen each other for four weeks because of his schedule. He thought that the 45 min drive from each other was "distance" that added an element of difficulty - we were (unofficially) dating 2.5 months and saw each other 5x in total.
Fireman drove an hour and 45 minutes just to visit me and saw me 5x in 2 weeks. Shiny carrot was just there when it was convenient for him. Fireman was leading, courting the relationship, and making me a priority like I hoped a man would do. Shiny carrot made it seem like I was just an option. Fireman makes me his "F*CK YEAH!"
I started realizing that my shiny carrot was, in fact, a test and an expander. I finally decided to let him go after rationally assessing where I was at with both of them, letting him know that it wasn't working out. I also told him that I learned so much from him about what I want in a man, what I value that he showed me, and that consistency and presence were more important to me than I realized. It was time for me to create that space that I needed in order to move forward.
The day I let him go, my firefighter stepped up and talked about progressing the relationship. :) Fast forward to now, where I am officially his girlfriend (something my shiny carrot was afraid to even consider). All of that to say... my shiny carrot served as something beautiful in my story, and the universe showed me that even though I had an exact idea of how I wanted this story to go, it wasn't going to just let me settle for being someone's second best. It had a different plan for me, and apparently, getting stuck in the snow in a terribly unfortunate situation was what it was going to take.
Never in a million years expected a Hallmark story like that to happen, and while that story isn't finished yet, that in itself is a testament to "what's meant to be will find its way." Major THANK YOU to Lacy, to this process, and to the universe for reminding me why it's so important to stay in my worth and OWN my deservingness. I love this community and am so thankful for the expanders and connections made. I hope this story serves as some hope for anyone questioning the process, or even just as expansion. XOXO
If you'd like, please include your IG handle:: @taylorridge
What is your cultural upbringing and background?: Hispanic/Hawaiian - raised in a lenient Christian + Spiritual environment
