Jumping Off A Cliff & Launching My Art Career
Name: Leslie Adkins
Where do you reside?: Topanga, CA
What is your cultural upbringing and background?: I am bi-racial, my mother is white with French heritage, and my Father is Black. I grew up in Champaign, IL, two hours south of Chicago, IL. It was a University town so it was very diverse, and I grew up around a lot of other bi-racial children. It wasn't until adulthood that I realized most places are segregated. My father was a police officer, which was interesting & terrifying for me as a child. My parents have been married for 43 years.
Are you currently a Pathway Member?: Yes
What was on your manifestation list?: I've had many things on my manifestation list, but I'll focus on some major ones that I've manifested: A partner, a move to Topanga, a paid package (fuck you fund) when I left my corporate job, an art studio in Topanga, a first solo art show and five paintings SOLD (including two celebrity buyers) which has given me enough money to keep going with art full-time.
What workshops did you use and what blocks did you discover during the DIs & workshops?: I did How to Manifest (x2), Unblocked Love, Unblocked Inner Child, Unblocked Shadow (x2), Unblocked Money. My first boyfriend died when I was 21 years old, and I had major blocks from the complicated grief of that experience. (I'm 37 years old now) I also have two parents that are on the narcissistic spectrum, so I was attracting narcissistic partners because it was familiar to me. My whole childhood was punishment based, and I would get in trouble or punished very often; being hit by my parents, and sent to hours-long time-outs was child abuse, and I had very low self-worth because of these experiences. The magnetic parent exercise in the inner child DI was life-changing for me.
I also have a great deal of shadow that I've had to work through, and I am still working through. Shadow workshop is the most challenging for me to complete. My parents also told me the starving artist story & limiting beliefs around being creative a lot growing up and into adulthood. I also had ancestral trauma to work through, which can be particularly painful. I also have had to do a lot of work around a lack mentality. My mother, in particular, lives in a lack of victim-hood state of mind. So yeaaaa, a lot of trauma to sort out and heal through.
What expanders did you find?: My whole Instagram is full of expanders. Women business owners who were friends and other successful female artists I followed closely. I would look at their websites, IG's, interviews and consume all of their content. I found expanders that also displayed the effortless confidence and self-worth glow that I wanted to embody. For partnership, I had to watch TV to find couples that had the relationship I wanted. Part of my authentic code is freedom (travel, financial), so I try to find women that can work from anywhere and travel as part of their creative work.
What tests did you face? Which did you pass? Not pass?: For partnership, I had tests like my ex contacting me, which I completely ignored. I also had a fling that was fun, but I knew it wasn't my person, so I cut it off, and then less than two months later, I connected with my partner. The other tests for my art show, art studio, showed up as emotional triggers. Most of my tests are now emotional triggers. I usually take them through a DI, and they reveal a block. So my tests reveal my blocks (limited beliefs) that need to be healed before the manifestation can show up. Example: Before my first solo art show, I was tested financially. I was down to my last $500 the day before the show and was being triggered with lack but tried to remain in the trust.
Did you experience a magic dark period? If so, tell us about it.: I did for partnership, but it was less than two months, and I was totally in a let-go state of mind, at peace. I had a longer magic dark before leaving my corporate job. It was several months long (5 months), and it was tough. That might be why it lasted longer because it was more difficult for me to stay in a let-go state of mind when I was being reminded every day how toxic the job was. The paid package showed up when I least expected it. The magic dark for my art has shown up but all very short....so I take that time to make more art and try not to focus on what's not showing up. Lack mentality will show up a lot in the magic dark, so I try to identify it when it shows up and go to the DI's or reframe the lack. I notice things show up when I've surrendered and not focused so intensely on the manifestation.
How did your manifestation come through?: The corporate package came out of the blue. My boss just offered it to me during a one on one meeting one day because she knew I wanted to do something more creative. My partner and I have a mutual friend that introduced us at a wedding. The art studio came through with a ping to reach out to the Topanga community on Nextdoor. The art show happened at a new gallery in Topanga, and my bf sent me one of the IG posts, and so I reached out to the owner directly to see how I could help, and we connected and then planned the show!
How long did it take for your manifestation to come through after crafting your initial list?: Partner: 8 months. Corporate package: about one year. Art studio (I've wanted my whole life LOL). Art show: 8-9 months.
How frequently were you using the workshops and DI's when you noticed the biggest shift surrounding your manifestation?: I do one workshop at a time, with a few months in between each one. I do DI's 2-4 times a week, depending on my schedule. I also have a TM practice, so I am meditating two times a day already. Journaling speeds up the process.
How do you incorporate this work into your life on a daily basis? Any tips, tricks or recommendations for getting the most out of it, or personalizing it?: I'll add a DI at the end of one of my TM practices. If I wake up in the middle of the night, 3-5 am, I will do one during the witching hour. When I have some time alone for an hour, I will do some journaling. I really just let it flow sometimes, I will choose to do the work instead of watching TV or some other numbing activity. I've also done a DI while hiking or bathing.
If you'd like, please include your IG handle: @leslieadkins_art
Is there anything else you think we should know? If you made this process your own in any way, this is the perfect spot to share that.: Here is the post I made in the community. It is in story format, so it may be more helpful: I would like to share, hoping it will be expansive for anyone moving from a corporate career to a full-time artist. There was a long journey before the one I'm about to share, but this is the latest jump of careers, so I'll stick to that. I moved to Los Angeles in 2015 with no job and $600 in my bank. I sold my car the second month in order to get an apartment in Hermosa Beach. I had recently graduated from art school in Chicago and had done yoga teacher training in Thailand.
Not confident nor expanded enough to pursue my art yet. It was a pipe dream at this point. I decided to pursue yoga and got a job at a very popular yoga company. The first three years were amazing, I worked from home, absolutely adored my co-workers, and then there was a shift in leadership. I had to start working in the office, and the environment became incredibly toxic for me. Without promotions, I tried to start a diversity initiative that was totally squashed, and I became increasingly miserable and knew I needed to leave after five years of working there. Before this, in 2018, I hit a major rock bottom and had an awful breakup with not only my boyfriend but my long-time best friend, and my apartment was trashed by an Airbnb guest all on the same day. But this was MAJORLY important to changing my life.
I had already dabbled in TBM work for a couple of years, but I decided to get serious. I took several workshops and did other healing modalities to heal codependency and childhood abuse trauma, which led me to stop attracting narcissistic relationships. Flash forward. Finally, in 2019 I was in debt but knew I needed to stand in my worth and leave my toxic job. The problem was, I was in more credit card debt than ever before because my rock bottom was also financial, and I knew I needed a fuck you fund. One day, my boss said she noticed I was unhappy and wanted to have a more creative role that she couldn't promise to me. So she offered if I wanted to put together a 2-month paid package that would give me a cushion for transitioning to another job. I told her I would think about it, and I knew this was my out.
I negotiated three months' pay, and I could apply for unemployment if I wanted, but it was up to me. I said no to unemployment (at first) but took the package! Yay, I was free! My last day was February 28th, 2020. I decided to take a few weeks off to relax, and then as we all know the shutdown happened two weeks into becoming unemployed. WHOA! Triggers came up. I was scared but tried to stay in trust and dig into TBM and my artwork. Finally, I decided to apply for unemployment, and that floated me through a year of exploring art, applying for jobs, and realizing I never wanted to work for another person again. I started saving all the money I could. Working side hustles after unemployment. I've been living off of savings since August 2021 and have committed fully to being a painter.
I was on the verge of having enough work to have a show. At this point, most of my tests are emotional triggers, and there have been A LOT. But I went back to work, and during this 3-year journey from rock bottom, I also manifested my partner, an art studio, and a move to Topanga Canyon. My partner sent me an IG posting of a new gallery in Topanga, and I immediately reached out to see how I could participate and help. The gallery owner was super sweet and amazing. We connected and planned out a solo show for me! Here we are, two days after my solo show, and I sold four paintings, lots of prints, and 2 of my collectors are celebrities.
BOOM, I have enough money to keep going and pursuing my full-time art career! Btw, I was on my last $500 of savings the day before the show. I hope this is expansive, and please let me know if you have more specific questions or want to know anything about my other manifestations! This work has changed my life, period. It works!!!
